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Old September 25th, 2009
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NFL Plaxico Burress' new roommates aren't being very welcoming

As Plaxico Burress checked into his new residence at Rikers Island yesterday, fellow inmates showered him with chants of "a--hole" and "Giants suck," according to the New York Post.

The "a--hole" chant seems like a pretty brave card for the residents of Rikers Island to be playing. I'm not arguing that Plaxico should be up for any Nobel Peace prizes or anything, but on the list of crimes that land people in Rikers, shooting yourself in the leg has to be among the mildest. The list of guys who did less to end up in the same place has to be pretty short. Glass houses, boys.

The "Giants suck" chant is lame, too. Number one, the Giants don't suck, and number two, Plax doesn't play for the Giants anymore, so what does he care? It's like taunting Duck Phillips with a "Sterling Cooper sucks" chant.

These prisoners. All that time on their hands, and they can't come up with better chants? Maybe it's time to give that GED course another shot, Spider.

Plax got a new number, too. If you're keeping track in your program, it's no longer No. 17, it's 09-R-3260. Correction Department spokeswoman Linda Foglia told the Post what Plax's life behind bars will be like.

"He will be separated from the inmate population at all times and confined to a single cell," Foglia said. He'll only get out for three hours of recreation per day, plus his required meetings with counselors and medical and mental health staffers. He's allowed three showers a week and one visit per weekend, Foglia said. At 11 p.m., it's lights out.

June 6, 2011 is the earliest we'll see him again, if he behaves himself in the pokey. Best of luck, Plax.

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